l. SURELY THOU ART MAD (Or, "Girl You Ain't Crazy!!). The Rhoda Incident: (Internal Relationship And One’s Own Integrity) Knowing and trusting the inner 1ife.-- When they tell you you're crazy when you see what you see, hear what you hear, know what you know (Acts): Issues of feminine devaluation, trivialization and our cooperation in the drama.
2. DAMNED IF I DO AND REALLY DAMNED IF I DON‘T. The Vashti Incident (Personal Relationships) The Men in Our Lives: Preachers, Pastors, Bishops, Lovers, Husbands, Kings, male protégés and the Approach - Avoidance Dance. "He loves me, He loves me not..." "He'll use me, He use me not._" Issues of feminine beauty, power and compliance in the church.
3. I'M JUST GLAD TO BE HERE. The Esther Incident (Hierarchical Relationships): The Organization as surrogate parent; Our "Father Hungers": Piety as Prostitution; Understanding the Old "Family of Origin Issues” and Getting free from the approval trap. Demythologizing others' positions and choosing to exercise your own.
4. YOU DON‘T (usually) HAVE TO FEAR ME, I'VE ALWAYS BEEN YOUR FRIEND. The Deborah/ Barak/ and Jael Incident (Lateral Relationships). When gifts are different and hers are more visible. How Black Women Lead Differently, and What Difference that makes for the Church and Leadership. Exploding the Myths of Male Castration and Female Sister Hatred. When a tent peg is deserved.
5. THE SISTERING CONNECTION (The Ruth and Naomi Incident. You have what we did not -- the availability of mentors, role model and allies and sponsors and loving personal friendships; The role they play both personally and professionally. Knowing what to watch for, and what to avoid (Dependency, co-dependence, competition and boundary confusion in sistering relationships). How to use and be used in the best possible sense. Pointing her to a future of her own--from Mahlon, Chilion to Boaz
6. I IUST WANTED HIM / HER TO LOVE ME (Life in Sychar: The Incident at The Well). The recurring traps of sex and bonding in ministry relationships. The sparcity of intimacy as a shepherd. Surrogate husbands- surrogate wives. Marrying your respective ministries when you can’t legitimately marry each other. Giving yourself away in the name of the Lord.
7. RAW POWER AND CONTROL (The Concubine Incident). When economic dependence makes you a slave. What they do to slaves. The collusion between the fathers in ministry and their sons in ministry. Abused all night until she dies. When your demise is considered his insult. The fallacy of negotiation, in this instance.
8. THE CLERGY COUPLE EXPERIMENT (Did Pricilla and Aquilla actually like each other?) Demarcating the "clergy" from the "couple". When the wife is really a pastor too, and not just a political appointment. The resentment of submission to the will of another. The tasks of turf and territory within the same unified context. To honor rather than instruct. Modeling a two parent family in the church. Other Models for Church Staff.
9. HAVING WHAT IT TAKES (The Huldah Incident--When they need YOU). ll Kings 22, ll Chronicles 34 Knowing your strengths, packaging yourself, celebrating your strengths, submitting your weaknesses. Or celebrating my weaknesses and submitting my strengths. Understanding the needs for context and compatibility; image; communication style, body language and the ability to stop working against yourself. Knowing how gender complicates and enriches the atmosphere. Issues of money, pay, honoraria, valuing the gift or dying poor.
10. FOR MY BROTHERS.
11. COUNTING THE COST AND CLAIMING THE PRIZE. Considering the yoke of a call versus a profession. When this calling demands more than you had intended to surrender. The wounds and sorrows of ministry: "Do I qualify? Moral failure: rationalizations and repentance as ministers. Is it worth all this? Marriage, singleness, divorce, female bonding, financial security and the aftermath. Anchoring the soul till the storm passes by.
12. THE MINISTRIES OF HELP - The assistant minister, church secretary, administrator, board member or staff associates. A close up challenge for those who serve close up. The lessons from Absolam, Gehazi and Aaron. |